Think of your house. When you moved out at 18, Did you buy every single thing you would ever need? Do you still have all of those things? Have you added nothing since that originally move?
More than likely, the answer to to these questions is no. I know I sure didn't. I bought the basics. Dishes. Silverware. Basic furniture. Some decorations from my room at my Mothers.
Most people do as I did. They buy the basics and get the rest as they go. When I moved into my first apartment, I got a rectangular black coffee table. When I moved into my second apartment, I put a bamboo table runner on this table. A few months later, I bought a treasure chest and painted it. This was placed in the middle of the table, begging to be filled. Later, it was filled guitar picks and movie ticket stubs.
The point I'm trying to make is that, as time passes, I add more things to each place I live in. Some I take away because they don't fit me quite the same as they used to. Others fit in just perfect, still.
This is the same concept of my life. I always feel as though I am an "unfinished" person, because as life continues I do different things, gain new interests, have different dreams.
I am constantly changing. In a way, this is terrifying. I feel as though I will never be able to fully mesh with someone because I will always be changing. I will never really be a "finished" person.
I feel as though I knew more about myself at 16 than I do now. At 16 I had such strong views on everything. I felt as though they could never be budged. Now that I'm older, I realize that they is a lot of more gray area than I had ever believed possible. It's a lot harder to be on one side or another when so much gray arises out of nowhere. I supposed my black and white world has been colored by experience and the tales of others.
When I meet someone new, they're way of life, they're attitude, everything about them smudges off on me just a little. This has been the case for every person close to me in life. I start seeing things their way. I start seeing things about them that i'd like more than my current position. I pick these things up. They're positive outlook on like. The way they like to learn new things. Things that I see that could make my life more fulfilling. I've done this with every friend I've had and every boyfriend I've dated.
Because of Brian, I strayed further away from God.
Because of Rusty, I realized men with a whole lot of emotion are not for me.
Because of Ryan, I took a second look at bands like Pink Floyd, Led Zeplin, and Black Sabbath.
Because of Brad, I gained a whole new appreciation for what the military does for our country.
Because of Charles, I learned how the corrupt live and I liked it.
Because of Lance, I've picked up on playing guitar, a new kind of humor, and appreciating the little things even more.
Because of Alex, I gained high expectations for a best friend. She made me a happier person anytime I was around her.
Because of Dani, I dance a little more, laugh a little harder, and try to find more things to create.
Because of Susan, I learned to crochet.
All these people have been part in creating who I am today. I've taken tidbits of them and put them into myself. I've learned from them and been part of them. All of the things I am did not come at once. Each person I met added a little piece of their own.
In the same sense, each new experience I have will leave the same kind of footprint, big or small. It will leave me a little different than who I was before.
I feel like I will never be a "finished" person, but I like that. It leaves an heir of mystery to life.
Don't forget to check out Blame It On the Weather: 15 Reasons I Hate Winter
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