These are all the interesting tweets from this year.
One cannot be angry when one looks
at a penguin.-January 3rd
Halloween: "how about we dress
up and go on a double date?" "Idk, We were kind of thinking of
staying home and dressing up as naked people"-January 5th
In the end, we only regret the
chances we didn't take, relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions
we waited too long to make.-January 7th
I have been around the block, with
blockheads just like you #Hercules-January 12th
Has anyone else had the sick idea to
name their first child the same name as their first car? My first car's name
was Marla.-January 12th
Is it old fashioned to want to get
married BEFORE you have kids these days? Or even at all?-January 19th
Easy bake oven? That's what i'm
gonna call my van.#howimetyourmother-January
20th
Helpful tip: always make sure
there's toilet paper in the stall BEFORE you take a crap.-February 14th
Today at work a customer told me,
''whoa, i thought there was a fire in the back because of that hair of yours''-February
18th
i hear great power comes with great
responsibility. So i just want to be able to bend a fork with my mind. That's
all.-March 4th
Money may be the root of all evil,
but evil things make people happy. Like drugs and premarital sex. :D-March
8th
I don't think my rat cares for
bacon. I'm pretty sure this means we can't be friends anymore.-March 23rd
You might not be the right one. It
might not be the right time.-April 11th
I need to go cactus shopping pronto.-April
19th
Don't confuse neediness for love.
Because obsession never lasts and you're insane by a landslide.-May 7th
Miscarriage is god being a dirty
indian giver. #thatguyisanasshole-May 11th
From where i'm standing, my grass is
green.-May 18th
They say you are what you eat. Well,
i ate a big ole' bowl of cocoa COOL this morning. #nojoke #ireallydid-June 2nd
Stay for a few of those late night
episodes, miss opportunities and i don't care's. There's not alot that i feel
obliged to share.-June 10th
I like meeting people alot more when
i never find out their real name. Hello green eyes. It was lovely to
meet and talk to you. My name is bracelet.-June 19th
Whats the difference between girls
of our generation and peanut butter? One spreads easily and the other is peanut
butter.-July 3rd
I really hate being called
Brittany-July 3rd
I've always wanted a boyfriend that
played guitar. It's extremely sexy.-July 10th
You don't know you're beautiful.
That's what makes you beautiful.-September 11th
Today is national talk like a pirate
day. Today was also dress like a pirate day at work. #theyknowhowitgoes-September
19th
I pet a snake in the woods
yesterday. Then i ran. It was exciting.-October 17th
Whoever invented grills took the
phrase "put your money where your mouth is" way too seriously.-November
2nd
Everybody's talking in their sleep.
They push a lot of air around, but don't say much of anything.-November
26th
Dear Winter, It's over. It's you,
not me. You make me miserable. I think it's time I start seeing other seasons.-December
16th
Here are the pictures summing up this year.
In any case, I'm going to write any e-mail to my future self tonight. I'm going to send it to December 31, 2013. We'll see where I am a year from now.
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