A New Beginning with a Blast Into the Past

I haven't been much into blogging lately, life has been so hectic. I figured there's no time better than now, though. I'm home alone for the next five days with four cats and no fiance.

Today, Lancelot and I embarked on our new journeys for a better life. Mine included taking a stroll down the street to my favorite gas station to finally get a look behind the counter and Lance's path is taking a 5 day trip to Illinois for training with Charter Communications. I'm so proud of him.

I'm so happy we're both out of Accent. Every single day was a struggle and left us so emotionally drained that we weren't able to make room for happiness in our lives. With our jobs now, I'll only see Lancelot about 50% of the time I was seeing him then (if not less), but I think overall we will be happier.

It's bizarre to think of where we were a year ago. I had just hit my one year mark at Accent and Lance was coming up on his three year mark. We were finally in an apartment with our kitties and we were still working on losing the weight we had put on in the beginning of our relationship. I still had long hair and so did Lance.

It's so insane to think this was a full year ago. Things have changes so much since then. Eight months ago, Lancelot and I got engaged. At that time, we spent every minute of every day together between work and home time. They only times we were apart were hidden in our seperate sleep schedules. 

Today is the first day of our new jobs. Lance left at 6:00 this morning and coming home to an empty apartment was a terribly sad moment. I'm glad my cats are more than happy to keep me company.

Things seem so strange, now. I'm having flashbacks to that time I lived alone. I walked home from work to an apartment that felt too cold even though the thermostat was set at 82 degrees in the middle of summer. The fridge looks like a high school student stocked it and the only sounds I will hear is the pitiful meow of our cats reminding me that I forgot to feed them this morning before work. 

The only thing I hold onto during these times is the feeling of being awake when the rest of the world is asleep and the hopes that when I lie down to sleep that the nightmares will not invade my dreams saying "He's never coming home."

I'm ready for Lance to be back, already. I want him to hug me and tell me that these trainings won't last forever. I want him here so I know he's safe from all the crazy drivers out there and not dead in a ditch from a hit-and-run. 

Can I sleep the next five days, please?